Keeping Your Faith

This time last year, my immediate family was in the midst of a medical crisis like we had never before experienced.  Fear, like I had never known, was in our home as we watched one of our children's health spiral out of all control.  I asked the Lord to give us wisdom in the situation, to direct us to the best doctors, to help us get through the day.  I prayed daily for so many things, and the Lord answered those many prayers.  As the initial shock of the disease subsided and we began to sink into this new version of reality, I responded like I do to most things and immersed myself in learning everything about this disease.  This coping mechanism that I have usually restores my sense of control in a situation; but this time it didn't.  A feeling of despair started to settle over me as I began to learn the depth of this disease--that these types of flare-ups will continue off and on for the rest of my child's life. We will go through this again.  And again.  And again.  I felt desperate, desperate enough to start pounding at heaven for healing.  So I did.  Probably some of you reading this prayed for that healing, too.  I have written about this family struggle and its lessons before, but this is not exactly what I am getting at today.  Today, I am cautiously approaching a very difficult and personal subject that this recent experience has created for me.  I want to talk about praying for healing that does not come, wondering if your faith just wasn't enough for it to happen, and keeping your faith in The Lord when His answer is “no”, or at the very least “not now”.

     "For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day.” John 6: 38-40 His will has never been to "give His believers an easy life."  God's idea and our idea of health, healing and safety are not the same.  Let me repeat that, God's idea of healing and our idea of healing are not the same.  He wants us healed for eternity. His plan and His will for His creation is for us to willingly abide in Him, to choose faith in Him over all others.  When He allows pain, suffering and trials to occur and remain in the lives of His believers, He is saying, "I have healed you, the deepest part of you, the part that is eternal, your soul. Let me redeem this evil, sickness, or pain in your life, and restore you.  My desire is for you to be in fellowship with Me eternally.  I will use this short earthly life to teach you to be more like Me.  No matter the earthly cost.".

     This faith response is not easy. I don't think it ever will be.  Perhaps it isn't supposed to be.  The Lord is not asking us to go off the deep end and allow all things to just happen without our protection or responses.  There are some that take this concept to the extreme and choose no intervention at all. No medicines, doctors, protection, etc.  I don't believe that is what the Lord is saying.    I believe He is saying, "Don't miss Me in the midst of this. Just watch how I can redeem this earthy evil.  Watch what I do in you and through you, with this."   “And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” 1 Peter 5:10

     I see God and His loving hand all over the place, in the midst of this pain.  If He had reached down and immediately answered my prayer for healing of my child, many, many eternal lessons of faith and spiritual growth would not have happened, and I’m sure there are many more to come.  “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us” Romans 8:18 His timing is perfect.  His will is perfect.  We either trust that His will is Righteous, or we don't. That is a hard reality, but truth none the less.

     As believers, we believe and rely on verses like this one:

"….Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.' " Matt 17:20  "I have faith!" we tell ourselves.  "I have a mountain that needs to be moved, let's get to moving!"  Or what about when another well-meaning Christian suggests to you that “you have to have faith it will happen” or “name it and claim it!”  But, what happens when that mountain doesn't move, when the answer is "no", when the healing or miracle doesn't come?  Was your faith not enough?  Has the Lord betrayed you or let you down?

"Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Cor 12:8-10  Three times, Paul begged the Lord to take away a pain or physical ailment from which he suffered.  Three times, God said, "No."  If Paul is a worthy example of asking for ungranted healing (and he is), then we should stop and take note of how Paul responds.  The Lord answered Paul's prayers by giving him something bigger than earthly healing.  He gave Paul a reason to continue to rely on the Lord.  With that reliance on the Lord's power…Paul's faith moved big mountains, but not the mountain he was praying about.  He wrote most of the New Testament and, along with Peter, laid the foundations of Christianity all over the world.  Could Paul have done that without relying on the Lord's strength so completely?  Could Paul have done all this if he felt betrayed by the God he served? The Scripture says even "small" faith I have is adequate.  So, it seems, the “amount” of faith we have is not the issue.

     I truly believe that the enemy uses this issue, perhaps more that any other to rock the faith of Christians.  Satan would love nothing more than for Christians to continue believing that our faith just isn't enough, that we didn't “earn” the healing, or that God didn't “pick me”.  Walking in those lies disables our effectiveness for Christ in this world.  Yes, there are healings and miracles today, but, not every believer receives them as we think we should.  Why?  I don’t know.

We all know faithful believers who have begged God to heal them or a loved one, or to change a situation and He didn't.  Believers die.  Believers suffer.  Believers struggle, right along with the rest of the world, regardless of the state of that person’s faith, regardless if they seem to have “earned it” through obedience to The Lord.  That’s not how our God decides.  We obviously have a different perspective on pain and suffering in our lives then God does. The truth is that God owes us, His believers, nothing but salvation.   He owes me nothing more. I owe Him.  We owe Him.  Everything past Salvation, such as spiritual growth or deeper relationship with Him are all acts of His love toward us.

     Read how Roger Barrier puts it:  "….Too often we are obsessed with removing pain and problems. God, on the other hand, is obsessed with sensitizing our inner spirits. God will sacrifice the body every time if that is what it takes to mature the eternal!  We can pray seven times to be healed of cancer; nevertheless, we will eventually succumb to death. Life is a terminal disease. Praying for healing is not eternally effective. There are no Biblical verses which describe angels rejoicing when bodies are healed! On the other hand, the angels rejoice when a lost sheep enters into eternal life."

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart." Jer 2:11-13

     We will suffer and face trials while here on this earth, no matter who we are.  I would rather go through these things with Him, under the Almighty’s watchful eye, redemptive power, and restorative hand, than without Him.   In Scripture, we can look to Moses for instruction and inspiration.  When after decades of wandering, suffering, homelessness, slavery, sin and judgments, the Israelite people were finally about to experience entry into the Promised Land.  God said to Moses  “Go up to this land that flows with milk and honey. But I will not travel among you, for you are a stubborn and rebellious people. If I did, I would surely destroy you along the way……Then he (Moses) said to Him, “If Your Presence does not go with us, do not bring us up from here.” Exodus 33:3,15 Moses responds by saying, “I don’t want it, without You.”  Perfect land, promised blessings, bountiful provision were all promised in this land, and Moses says NO, not without You going with us Lord. Moses instructed the Israelite's and they humbled themselves before the Lord, admitted their need, repented of their sin and disobedience.

     What happened next?  The Lord answers Moses prayer with a “yes”, and agrees to keep His presence with His chosen people while they received the Promised Land. “So the Lord said to Moses, “I will also do this thing that you have spoken; for you have found grace in My sight, and I know you by name….. And he said, “I will make all my goodness pass before you and will proclaim before you my name ‘The Lord.’ And I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy.”  Exodus 33:17,19

     Did the Israelite’s difficulties, persecutions, trails and sufferings end because the Lord remained with them?  Hardly.  One look at the today’s news will prove that.  But they refused to move one more step without the Lord.  The Lord showed them Grace, because He chose to not because they earned it.  That is how we should respond today. The Lord didn't change, fix or remove one thing (mountain) about the Israelite’s situation that day.  Instead He changed, fixed and restored the hearts of Israelite’s.

     Is it possible that the "mountains" we are begging to be moved may not be what we think they are? The Lord has purpose in allowing and not always moving our mountains.  The Lord uses the effects of this fallen world, and turns it around for His plans and for the good of those who love Him.  If that "mountain" brings a believer, a non-believer, me or my child to the point of fully relying on God, makes us holy, deepens faith, teaches us righteousness, teaches us compassion for others pain….then my faith is strengthened by knowing those things are true.  The Lord knows the desire of my heart is for my child to be healed. He knows that.  He has the same plans, plans for good for me and for my children. But we live in a fallen world with evil, illness and pain.  The miracle of God is that He can take those awful things meant to harm us or bring evil and use them for good.  All things submit to His righteousness in the end.

    I'm reminded of a frequent prayer of a mighty woman of God who I know. Whenever a prayer request is given to her she says, "We pray first for salvation, then for physical healing."  If you are a Believer, he has already healed you. Did you hear that?  You have already been healed!  Life after death, eternal life is healing, is it not?    “He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.” 1 Peter 2: 24  If God has not answered your prayer for healing like you thought He would, it has to be for a reason, it will be redeemed. "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." Romans 8:18

     I don't know if it is possible to be a parent without bombarding the Lord with prayers for health and safety for our children.  But the lesson here, for me anyways, is that He is faithful to answer those prayers the way He wants to, the way that is best for us, and I trust that.  His way is higher than my way.  In the end, His ways are the perfect answer and completion to our prayers for our children and for ourselves.  That is true no matter the situation or outcome.  That is true in pleasure and pain.  Isn't it just like this amazing God, whom we serve…to have taken my faith that didn't seem “enough” to move this mountain…and make that faith DEEPER, BIGGER AND STRONGER by not moving the mountain like I thought He should!  His will and His ways are trustworthy.

     If you are a believer and  find yourself in this type of situation today, wondering if your faith is enough, if God will say “yes”, if you can remain strong in faith if the answer is “no”.  Remember, the Lord is trustworthy and true. Walk in the truth today.  You have already been healed.